Sa thesis-Ako ay isang variable, INDEPENDENT variable baby!

There are instances in your life where you have to be involved with other people and work with them whether it's your first or favorable choice or not. Sometimes you get to know people through working with them. And there are just two outcomes-- it's either you'll admire them for working hard and doing their share of responsibilities or be mad, as in mad to them for doing the exact opposite.

So far, with my thesis groupmates...I am very disappointed. I was not expecting that they'll be like that. I had actually a different impression about them. I thought... nuhh, that was my mistake. I miscalculated things. Demn!

*those are my twitter entries on aug27-28..while doing chapter 4 of MY thesis!*

"Who bears the burden?"

*don't mind the title or its connection to this post. I ended up using it coz I actually wrote this on a piece of paper while I'm in my PubSec class and all I was hearing from my prof is that query. toinkz**



God created us in such a diverse manner. That's complicated right? Coz if He wants us to live harmoniously, then He must have just created us in a way that we are all similar almost in all aspects. Kaya siguro maraming problema ang lumillitaw because of this. Pero I am thinking that there must be a real good reason behind it. You see, this is just an example of those many issues that we cannot find any answer no matter how hard we try. Kaya nga sometimes, instead of looking for the answers, I just stop thinking and let it go. At the end of the day, it is God who knows all and we have to entrust to Him whatever problem is bugging us.

9:37am @ Rm320

Thesis is still a shit- deal with it!

I am not really on the mood to write something here...eh kaso, I was browsing this baby blog and realized that I was blogging about my thesis writing experience since I started this site. So this is kinda an update about my struggles and foolishness- talking about my thesis.

What happened with me and my old partner?

Our old adviser and the new one talked about our case and then decided that we should stick as groupmates. That idea was actually fine with me. However, my old partner decided to "migrate" to his new group now. So I guess, he hated me so much that he couldn't treat any professional work with me. We'll that's fine, that issue...whatever it is. I learned to forget and just let it go.

Syempre, I was left all alone and our new thesis adviser was saying na solo na lang ako. (Meron pa ngang side story to this but I'll just ommit it to shortened the story) Ano ako hilo to take that? Solo? as in alone?! Hell NO syempre. Anu 'to patayan? HAHA Although honestly speaking, maitatawid ko naman ng mag isa yun (yabang) siguro. Pero practically speaking, that would not do. So ayun, I ended up joining a new group. Pakapalan na lang ng mukha to approach and then ask them kung pede akong umepal sa group nila. What a move di ba?

New group. New topic. New horizon.

Introducing my new groupmates- Jherson Jaya and Christopher Alvarado
They are not the usual kind of people I hang out with but I do still have a good shot on them. They're okay naman, esp when I asked them na makiki-group ako. I remember Jherson said na mas okei raw dahil 3 na ngayon ang gagawa. So ayan, I read their first three chapters. Ask questions. Read some journals. At kung anu ano pa. BUT!! yah a bigtime but there. One time, while hanging out in the library, may naisip si Jherson bigla. He was telling me na super interested sya sa topic namen ni old partner. Sana raw kinuha ko na. Eh sabi ko, binibigay nga actually yun saken but I refused to bring it with me because in the first place it was his idea. So di ba, consuelo de bobo ko na yun sa effort nya. Pero si Jherson gusto talaga. Ayun, he grabbed Toffs phone and called my old partner. By the time Jherson has put down the phone, the old topic is ours. Kinda funny ba? I don't know what word would match how I felt eh. kinda weird siguro. I totally don't know.

I have to cope with the situation. So ayun. The pace was put on me since ako yung mas gamay sa topic.

Fast forward

Kanina ko lang natapos ang pag revise sa first two chapters. Mentally tiring sya. It was difficult kasi wala na yung mga journals ko (both soft and hard copy). Basta it was very difficult doing it. *whew* Yung chapter 3, si Jaya na yung gumawa. Sana matapos na nga nya yun bukas. Actually dapat talaga tapos na kasi we really need to run our data na. Nafi-feel ko kasing mangangarag kami. Geez. Chapter 4 will be bloody for sure. Naku. I'm kinda nervous and scared but I have to deal with it. Kahit pa anung hate messages i-post ko about thesis writing, still it is my/our passport to graduate. So no matter how hard it is, I have to deal with it. Face it coz you can't really hide from it. Sige lang. More pressure! Bring it on baby! I know I can do it. Mahihirapan nga lang talaga ako.
*sorry if I might sound bragging, pardon me. this is how I console myself from all the pressures and headches I am experiencing right now.

RIP Cory Aquino

I will admit, I am not a fan of the late Cory Aquino as a public figure. Maybe it's because I was not able to witness what people are saying that she is the symbol and that she brought back democracy to this country. Probably because I did not witness first hand the EDSA revolution. Or maybe I just don't have that impressive impression on her. However, I admire her as a woman. She is the real epitome of a mother. A mother who gives justice to the phrase- unconditional love. I feel for Kris and her other siblings for saying that they actually lied to their mother when they said that they would be fine and that they would let go. Children have this strange connection to their mothers. Perhaps because they were in the womb for 9mos and that technically speaking they are the one who manages the duties in raising kids might have caused this peculiar bond. But it doesn't matter anyway to know the reason why. We love our mothers so much simply because they are a mother- the one who will do anything for the sake of their children no matter how difficult it could be. No doubt, Mrs Aquino did well in raising her children. It might be so hard for her raising them alone and faces lots of headaches but she never gave up believing and guiding them. Secondly, I commend her for having a strong faith and being a good follower of the Catholic church. Personally speaking, I am not sure if I could ever do such thing. She has a strong spiritual life. She always pray and never forget to attend masses. That is something big I must say. At this modern age, where there are many distractions she was able to maintain it. And lastly, the greatest trait that I was able to see in her was her calmness and being at peace all the time. Being a loud person, I am amazed by this. It seems like she doesn't face any problem. How I wish I could train myself to be like her. That whenever I face any difficulty, I would be as calm as her and then pray for a clear and peace of mind.

To Corazon "Cory" Cojuangco Aquino, I would like to say that you did inspire me not because you've once become a president, a public VIP or a mother to Kris and Noynoy but you inspire me because your a true and genuinely good person who lived in this world. Thank you for making me realized all of these. Thank you for reminding the Filipino people again that we have to do something, participate and be a good citizen for our beloved country. Thank you and may you now join our Almighty Father and continue to guide us up above in heaven.